


Little Bit Lost Without You

by silversky



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff, because it was shockingly hard to keep Vax emo in this, vague spoilers for episode 58
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-08
Updated: 2016-12-08
Packaged: 2018-09-07 03:29:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,157
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8781347
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/silversky/pseuds/silversky
Summary: She spun, arms outstretched, ethereal and joyous and giggling like a child. Vax took in the sight and fell in love for the thousandth time.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [RiverWye](https://archiveofourown.org/users/RiverWye/gifts).



> Title from Without You by Oh Wonder, which put me in just the right mood to write this.
> 
> A birthday gift for the person who got me into this fandom, and subsequently laughed at all my unspoiled screaming. Sorry it's not Gilmore angst (stay tuned?). Enjoy your fluff you nerd.

 

At the desolate edge of a long-forgotten village, perched on the crumbling remains of an old farm border-wall, Vax waited. His face stayed turned north, unwavering, as the weak warmth from the sun faded. Another hour passed, then two, then three. The dark feathers affixed to his armor rustled in the evening breeze. He shivered, cloak pulling tighter against his hunched shoulders.

Atop the far-off mountains the skies slipped into purple. Clouds edged with gold clustered on the horizon, then darkened and dimmed. The air around him became colder still as night set in, his slow exhales twisting into the open space like frosty waves. As children he and Vex’ahlia had pretended to be dragons when their breath became visible like this, taking turns as the vicious monster laying waste and the heroic warrior come to save the day. The memory stung, as did so many reminders of days gone past. Nothing he treasured stayed unmarred long.

A beam of moonlight peeked through the scattered cloud cover. It shone onto the boundless plain before him, illuminating acres of emptiness, nothing but swaying grass to catch his eye. He sighed, head drooping for a minute. Tiredness had crept into his limbs, muscles aching from the single position and prolonged cold. His mind too wavered from the wait. Inactivity would forever gnaw at him, no matter the circumstances. Promises meant nothing against a habituation to adrenaline and rushed decisions.

The clouds had shifted when his gaze returned skyward. Above him the moon hung exposed, full and bright and clear. The terrain, though, remained unchanged; more distinct in detail but without variation. No shifting movement. No sign of relief.

Then, at last, a flicker. In the distance a shadow approached, not on the ground as he had expected but across the pinprick stars. A more practical man would have remained still, confirming his conclusions before setting out. A more patient one would have as well.

As Vax rose, wings rippling into existence behind him, he thanked his Lady he was neither of those men.

However many times he took to the air, Vax knew he’d never outgrow the deep thrill that overtook him the second his feet left the ground. He didn’t have the soul-deep longing for it his sister felt, but flight had become more than an unexpected mode of transportation. It was freedom. It was beauty. In his rare quiet moments it let him soar into perfect solitude, alone with himself and his thoughts.

Ahead the tiny form grew, details sharper as he approached its height. He’d surmised correctly--it was an eagle, massive and awe-inspiring. Familiar. His lips curved into a helpless smile.

Vax sped forward, the matching darkness of his armor and wings making him all but invisible in the vast expanse of night sky. He was a shadow, a ghost, a phantom that disappeared near before he was seen. The anonymity delighted him, joy spreading warmth through his chest. Chuckles escaped him, louder and louder as he rushed to his destination.

Eventually she noticed. A screech echoed through the void separating them and Vax’s grin spread. He needed nothing more than to be by her side, to feel her smile against his own. His body strained from the urgency to reach her.

Instead the eagle dropped, a sudden plunge into black. Vax stalled, pulling up short as his wings worked furiously to keep him in place. A roar in his head, flashing memories of fallen friends, lost from sight and safety. Sudden chills shook him.

The endless moment had hardly passed before she reappeared, shooting up from the shadows beneath him. Wings spread wide she soared by, a last minute turn twisting her around him. She swooped again, and again, each movement bringing her closer. And finally Vax understood. Fear gone, he wrapped his wings around himself as he followed her down.

He heard a literal roar this time, the wind in his ears deafening, overwhelming. The plummet tore at his clothes, his braid going taut. His sight blurred as he fell, the ground below only jolting back into focus when he released. Taunting gravity he rose again into the sky. The return to flight shook a shout of exhilaration from him and he spun, trying to replicate the spirals that had beckoned him into this dance.

His partner paid his inexpertise no mind. She slid into place, copying his shaky turns with grace, her own tricks pulling him into ridiculous acrobatics. It was a waltz, equal and delicate, intense and addictive. With his father he’d despised these lessons, but now he could see the allure of each aerial step. Their closeness was a thrill, their balance a testament to their bond. Vax let himself get lost in the sensation of perfection.

Reality crept back in as his hour's end drew near, too quick for either of their likings. Before the magic could completely break Vax tore himself away and stumbled into a landing. His whole body shook from cold and exertion. The wind had torn any moisture from his eyes, making them itch and blur. And yet, for the first time in a long time, he felt as if anything were possible.

A few feet away a rush of energy coalesced into Keyleth, grinning ear to ear. Silvertipped and shining in the moonlight, her intricate headpiece was no match for the light in her eyes. She spun, arms outstretched, ethereal and joyous and giggling like a child. Vax took in the sight and fell in love for the thousandth time.

“Keyleth.” It came out as a whisper, his throat weak after so long in silence. He was no good with words—neither of them were, not really. There was so much to be said, so much brimming in their hearts, but no way to bring it out into the world. He just stared, desperate and breathless.

She stepped up to him, fingers brushing against his cheek. “I know,” she whispered back, still smiling. Her hand trembled. The space between them grew narrower. “I missed you too.”

Vax closed the gap. Her lips pressed against his, sweet as her laugh, strong as her convictions. This was true flight, moreso even than the real thing. It felt like home, just as their first kiss had. He knew they could have a thousand more and he would still marvel at every single one.

Keyleth pulled back to rest her face on Vax’s shoulder. He drew her in, wrapping his arms around her body and squeezing. Her hair brushed his face until he couldn’t help but kiss it as well, careful to avoid the horns that lay in his way. He closed his eyes and sighed.

There was much to do. The world was chaos and strife and no one in his family could let that stand. There would be more waiting, more pain, more loss. But for now he could be at peace.

Vax breathed.

Vax loved.

**Author's Note:**

> Tfw you try to write angsty Vax and it turns into a Vaxleth mating flight ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
> 
> This was an attempt to shift away from my usual style, hopefully it worked ok? I don't talk about Critical Role much on [ my tumblr](http://theoncomingcroat.tumblr.com/) but you're all still welcome to come yell at me about it!


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